{"product_id":"i-don-t-do-the-walk-of-shame-funny-adult-cow-t-shirt-mabel-pasture-after-dark™-by-pasture-problems-co-™","title":"I Don’t Do the Walk of Shame — Funny Adult Cow T-Shirt | Mabel | Pasture After Dark™ by Pasture Problems Co.™","description":"\u003ctable\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eXS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eM\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; 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border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003eSize tolerance, in\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI DON’T DO THE WALK OF SHAME.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eI make them leave.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSome people sneak out quietly the next morning.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI prefer to stay exactly where I am, drink my coffee, and let somebody else figure out how they’re getting home.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo shame. No awkward exit. No searching for yesterday’s clothes while pretending nothing happened.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIf anyone is doing the walk, it isn’t me.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis funny adult cow tee is for those of us who prefer confidence over regret and firmly believe the morning-after logistics should be somebody else’s problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of \u003cstrong\u003ePasture After Dark™ by Pasture Problems Co.™\u003c\/strong\u003e, this vintage-inspired farm design pairs Mabel with the kind of attitude that makes one thing very clear: she is not the one leaving.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHE SHIRT\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePrinted on the \u003cstrong\u003eGildan 64000 Softstyle® Unisex T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e, a lightweight, soft everyday tee with a classic fit that works for just about everybody.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSoft, ring-spun cotton feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLightweight and comfortable for everyday wear\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic unisex fit\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neckline\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShort sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in sizes \u003cstrong\u003eXS–5XL, when available\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDesign professionally printed to order\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShirt colors: \u003cstrong\u003eDark Heather, Black, and Purple\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBlack shown as the featured color\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFIT\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is a \u003cstrong\u003eunisex fit\u003c\/strong\u003e. Order your usual size for a classic relaxed fit. Size up if you prefer a roomier or oversized look.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePlease refer to the size chart before ordering for the best fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCARE INSTRUCTIONS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine wash cold, inside out\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eWash with similar colors\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTumble dry low\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDo not bleach\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDo not dry clean\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDo not iron directly over the printed design\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFREE SHIPPING\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFREE standard shipping within the United States.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIf somebody has to make the walk home, at least you won’t be paying for shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePLEASE NOTE\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is \u003cstrong\u003emade to order\u003c\/strong\u003e, so slight variations in print placement, color, and appearance may occur. Shirt colors may also appear slightly different depending on your screen settings and the garment color selected.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMockups are provided to show the design and approximate placement. Please review the size chart, color selection, and product details before ordering.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePasture After Dark™ by Pasture Problems Co.™\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSame Pasture. Worse Decisions.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Pasture Problems Co.™","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":51268595646707,"sku":"84758411369174483977","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268595679475,"sku":"28241002371771345544","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Purple","offer_id":51268595712243,"sku":"40492068671167133515","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":51268595745011,"sku":"81891693449778808631","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268595777779,"sku":"11673727043372013730","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Purple","offer_id":51268595810547,"sku":"33742917895653161320","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":51268595843315,"sku":"32782475636509348398","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268595876083,"sku":"30083467217707152463","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Purple","offer_id":51268595908851,"sku":"65011757368113946564","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":51268595941619,"sku":"57791581884877326199","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268595974387,"sku":"22560044197348646135","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51268596007155,"sku":"14157600106555789010","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":51268596039923,"sku":"72061014056121921206","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268596072691,"sku":"13903269896600928629","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51268596105459,"sku":"15060686455871444874","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":51268596138227,"sku":"69033094648492668936","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268596170995,"sku":"17593829730239561012","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51268596203763,"sku":"14939744797622671363","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":51268596236531,"sku":"23299371330241396724","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268596269299,"sku":"14275350193402824776","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51268596302067,"sku":"33854480574161312655","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":51268596334835,"sku":"30227800159004597146","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268596367603,"sku":"29941614351381566605","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Black","offer_id":51268596400371,"sku":"19853319748134631257","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Dark Heather Grey","offer_id":51268596433139,"sku":"15734171992964087462","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0854\/0179\/6851\/files\/20260913015208-1f1af15b-a779-6b16-ae3e-46ea0511a540.png?v=1789313626","url":"https:\/\/www.pastureproblems.com\/products\/i-don-t-do-the-walk-of-shame-funny-adult-cow-t-shirt-mabel-pasture-after-dark%e2%84%a2-by-pasture-problems-co-%e2%84%a2","provider":"Pasture Problems Co.™","version":"1.0","type":"link"}