{"product_id":"i-don-t-ride-broomsticks-i-prefer-cock-funny-adult-chicken-halloween-t-shirt-vivian-pasture-after-dark™-by-pasture-problems-co-™","title":"I Don’t Ride Broomsticks, I Prefer Cock — Funny Adult Chicken Halloween T-Shirt | Vivian | Pasture After Dark™ by Pasture Problems Co.™","description":"\u003ctable\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eXS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eM\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eXL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"1\" style=\"padding: 10px; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e5XL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"2\" style=\"word-break: break-word; 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border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-row=\"5\" style=\"word-break: break-word; border-top: 1px solid rgb(237, 237, 237); font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(82, 82, 82);\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDescription:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI don’t ride broomsticks. I prefer cock.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhy fly around on a stick when there are clearly better options?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis Halloween, I’m skipping the broom, keeping the pearls on, and making absolutely no apologies for my preferred method of transportation.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e“I DON’T RIDE BROOMSTICKS. I PREFER COCK.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA wickedly inappropriate Halloween shirt for chicken lovers, backyard flock owners, and anyone whose sense of humor gets considerably less respectable after dark.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHE SHIRT\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eGildan 64000 Softstyle® Unisex T-Shirt\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Soft ring-spun cotton feel\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Lightweight and comfortable for everyday wear\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Classic unisex fit\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Crew neckline\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Short sleeves\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Sizes XS–5XL, when available\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Professionally printed to order\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAvailable Colors:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e Black — \u003cstrong\u003eHero Color\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e Purple\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFIT\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is a unisex fit. Order your usual size for a comfortable, relaxed everyday fit. Size up if you prefer a roomier or oversized look.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePlease refer to the size chart before ordering for the best fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCARE INSTRUCTIONS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e• Machine wash cold, inside out\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Wash with similar colors\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Tumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Do not bleach\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Do not dry clean\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e • Do not iron directly over the printed design\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFREE SHIPPING\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFREE standard shipping within the United States.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo broomstick required.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePLEASE NOTE\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is made to order, so slight variations in print placement, color, or appearance may occur. Shirt colors may also vary slightly depending on your screen.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMockups are intended to show approximate design size and placement. Please review the size chart and product details before ordering.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis design contains adult humor and sexual innuendo and is intended for grown-ups who know exactly what the chicken joke means.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePasture After Dark™ by Pasture Problems Co.™\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Pasture Problems Co.™","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":51276959973619,"sku":"29499972253999257620","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960006387,"sku":"13101049418551872895","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":51276960039155,"sku":"20214739792075923252","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960071923,"sku":"25036673011620532386","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":51276960104691,"sku":"23218465676849153502","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960137459,"sku":"18121599747763528775","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":51276960170227,"sku":"13308444525269763311","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960202995,"sku":"12404429592496826752","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":51276960235763,"sku":"41201635319949477722","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960268531,"sku":"28669668906607920001","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":51276960301299,"sku":"27847073203559350656","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960334067,"sku":"27727712088653370865","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":51276960366835,"sku":"85145018391264845750","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Purple","offer_id":51276960399603,"sku":"24010604638096620522","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":51276960432371,"sku":"17771659380688568666","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Black","offer_id":51276960465139,"sku":"23092869908621400574","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0854\/0179\/6851\/files\/20260914004710-1f1afd5d-1c6f-6008-b417-1e45a9336967.png?v=1789346921","url":"https:\/\/www.pastureproblems.com\/products\/i-don-t-ride-broomsticks-i-prefer-cock-funny-adult-chicken-halloween-t-shirt-vivian-pasture-after-dark%e2%84%a2-by-pasture-problems-co-%e2%84%a2","provider":"Pasture Problems Co.™","version":"1.0","type":"link"}